On the Serious Side

I was laying in bed, trying to get to sleep, my mind was racing. I was thinking of all the things I did, all the things I needed to do and all the things I have to do tomorrow then my mind quickly went to all of my blessings. Our healthy family (other than the yearly cough Kevin now has again), Kevin's wonderful job that allows me to stay at home with Hudson, and the love from our family and friends. I then thought of Hudson. He is definitely my biggest blessing so far and wow - has he changed my life. He is so precious, and I am so thankful for each day that I get to be his mommy - even those days when I feel all he does is shake his head 'no' as he does something he's not supposed to but all I want to do is laugh. My mind wandered to Our Heavenly Father and His Son and the rememberance of the upcoming Easter weekend. I thought about how much Our Lord loved His Son just as I love Hudson. I then imagined myself making the same sacrifice Our Father made and my heart ached. He sent Jesus, His Son, to walk among us, teach us and eventually die for us. If given the choice, I'm not sure I could make the same one God made. It suddenly brought all of my trivial dilemmas in life into perspective - again. If God can know and understand what it is like to give up and lose a child, He definitely understands my struggles.
A few weeks back, Andy Stanley (our pastor) talked about quiet time with God. He mentioned how most of the time we do all the talking...asking, thanking, asking...and I was convicted. God is there for me to talk to, but what if he needs to talk back? Sometimes I think it's easier for me to 'work it out on my own,' but it's not. Anything and everything should be turned over into His hands for guidance and learning. I admit, I struggle with this but hope each day I can recall how awesome His sacrifice and turn everything over to Him!